They shot Old Yeller

Okay, NOW I understand why people are bitchy when they turn down dates half the time. Because if you try to be nice and let 'em down easy, they think if they ask you a couple more times that you'll change your mind.

The answer was NO, is NO, and evermore shall be NO.

GOD FUCKING DAMN I am ANNOYED.

To recap: this guy that works at the comic shop I go to asked me out on Saturday. Because it was so unexpected and I was so flustered, I wound up giving him my number. BAD. BAD. BAD IDEA. Did I mention...bad idea? I have known this guy in only the vaguest sense for a few years and have usually found him annoying. On more than one occasion, I have been downright rude to him because he was just pissing me the hell off. Yap, yap fucking yap.

On Saturday, when I was ambushed, I had said that this week was bad to call me because it is finals week. So what did the dumbass do? Call me on Sunday. When I'm trying to write my fucking papers. That didn't make me feel any better towards him. The whole time I was on the phone with him on Sunday, I kept cringing and thinking over and over "oh my god, I can NOT go on a date with this guy I will fucking DIE." His voice and the way he talks are like nails on a chalkboard to me. He sounds so whiney. AND he thought I was like 24 years old? Excuse me? He's about 1 1/2 years older than me. His last girlfriend was a lot younger, too. I have a healthy skepticism/distrust of men who date girls considerably younger than themselves. I have seen too many bad things. I mean, yes, we women are generally far more mature than guys anyway, but why? Are you looking to be a Svengali and get this pretty young thing to do shit with you that, a few years from now, she'll go WTF was I thinking? He's in his 30s and his main source of employment is clerking at a comic store. And he has no ambition to do anything else (and, yes, he pretty much told me that on the phone). That is so not going to work for me. Working in a comic shop is not a bad thing. But for me? I need a guy with a little more ambition than that. What would be doing? Going out on dates to fucking Taco Bell? I don't fucking think so.

I told him, between school and work, that I did not have time to date. I don't have time to date or to deal with the ancillary bullshit that dating brings with it. AND I certainly don't have time for someone that annoys the shit out of me. Actually, I didn't say the last two sentences, but you get my drift.

He was like "well, if you want to hang out sometime as a break from studying or something..."

I should have nipped it in the bud right there, but goddamn it I didn't. I thought I had gotten my point across well enough with the "I DON'T HAVE TIME."

Fast forward to today. After spending all day in the hospital, I finally went to the comic shop to pick up my stuff (new Buffy out today - excellent, although my eyes got scorched in a couple parts). He wasn't there - thank Christ. Oh, but Charwars was. And Charwars tells me that D (the guy) said to tell me to please call him. WTF? Are we in seventh grade? And WTF again because you don't do that to me. You don't even know me well enough to do that. There was even this bit in there about "not that he wants to come off as desperate, but give him a call." *rolls eyes* Okay, LESSON THE FIRST, if you have to preface yourself with "not that I want to appear desperate", DUDE, you ARE desperate.

That just pissed me off. I didn't even say anything in reply. I'm sure Charwars could tell I was angry.

After that, I went to the gym and spun around on the stationary bike like crazy for forty minutes and was STILL pissed off. I felt sick to my stomach. I had to shut off my cell phone because the battery was down. Thank god.

Cue to when I get home. I plug my phone in to the charger and turn it on. I have a voicemail. I thought maybe it was my friend Jesica because she was supposed to call me back. NOOOOPE. It's D. JESUS FRAKKIN CHRIST. He's on my voicemail. After telling him Saturday this was a bad week for me, he fucking calls once, has his coworker bug me AND FUCKING CALLS ME AGAIN. I wanted to scream. He wanted to take me out to see Spider Man 3. I deleted the voicemail before it was even done. Again, nails on a damn chalkboard. Can't stand his voice.

I found his number in my recent calls list and hit send. After "Hi", I was like "So, I ran into C and he told me that you wanted me to call AND I got your voicemail." Insert some random shit from him blah blah... I launched into "I told you that I didn't have time to date. I don't want to date right now. AND I do not want to date YOU okay?"

He was like "Oh...okaaaaay" in his whiney voice. I had to repeat myself once more just to be sure he got it. Because I think he's living in a bubble similar to the one George Bush is about Iraq. He said "well, just to hang out, you know?" God, I was so exasperated. I told him, "It's about managing expectations. I know what you want - you want to date. I DON'T. Those two are never going to meet in the middle." He's the type of guy that you have to shut down, because that kind will think they have some kind of claim on you if you go out with them once and they think they'll wear you down over time. I don't want to date you and I don't fucking want to hang out with you. (Didn't say that sentence, but god did I want to.)

CLUELESS. Utterly clueless. I gave one more "OK?" and he was like "oh, okaaaaaay, well give me a call sometime..."

*grabs face with hands* GOD, WHAT THE FUCK DO I HAVE TO SAY TO YOU TO GET THAT I DON'T WANT TO DATE YOU AND YOU WILL NEVER GET A CALL FROM ME? (Didn't say that either, but that's what I was thinking.) At that point, I just hung up on him.

If he even tries to call me again, I am going to just...I don't know. I don't know what I'll do, but it sure as hell won't be pretty. Some dumbass footballer tried to stalk me in college and believe you me, he learned to watch his step around me. Him and his whole damn house knew I was not to be fucked with. I haven't had to be that bitchy in years, but I'll do it in a heartbeat if I think I'm going to have trouble.


What is it with guys? Jesica just went on a date with a guy that she met at a bar. She won't be doing that again. During their conversation, the guy was like "Yeah, my sister and friends think I'm an asshole." Great way to sell yourself, numbnuts.

God damn. I'm just so aggravated. This is why I don't date. Too much fucking bullshit. Give me a pair of batteries and high-grade plastic any day over this trumped up asshattery.

I'm going to make myself a stiff margarita.

EDIT: Oh yessss. I love margaritas. I made myself a GOOD one. I feel good. I don't even feel remotely annoyed anymore. Sweet Cuervo waters of Lethe.