I am the Tech Support in my family

I have received more than one call to assist my niece
with her computer related problems.

I am not "Geek Squad" smart, but I do know the basics.

1 - I know my brother should have bought a damn MAC
instead of a fucking PC. That's probably the most
important thing.

2 - Helped my niece install iTunes and get her iPod
set up last Christmas.

Late last night I got a call because her laptop
crashed and she was wondering if she lost her music.
Winds up yes, because they had to wipe the drive and
reinstall the factory settings in order to get the
computer up again. All her music was on her iPod,
thankfully, so I told her she could get it back onto
the computer.

HOWEVER, trying to explain how to do that over the
phone was proving exasperating. My brother was taking
her to the mall out by me today, so she dropped off
her computer and iPod so I could be Computer Doc.

I AM the Master. Yes, I am. I did a little research,
and found freeware that reverse loads (iPod to
Computer, instead of the other way around) for
situations just like these. However, in the course of
reloading her music back on to the computer, I made a
gruesome discovery...

MY NIECE HAD THAT FUCKING PARIS HILTON SONG "STARS ARE
BLIND" ON HER IPOD. AS IN, SHE ACTUALLY FUCKING PAID
FOR THAT CRAP.

I felt...DIRTY. I felt foul. Oh, I was deeply shamed.
Next, she's going to tell me she's a fucking
Republican. *shudders*

I quickly shot off an email enquiring if I had to send
her to musical rehab. Lord. WHAT.THE.FUCK.

Paris Hilton. Completely without street cred.

My niece has a lot of "untz-untz" or Eurotrash pop
music. She's in competitive cheerleading, so it makes
sense. It's not the most intelligent of music, but it
does have good beats to do their cheer routines. I dug
out my "NOW (that's what I call Music)" compilation
CDs. No, not the American ones, I got the bona fide UK
discs, people. Oh, so much more pop-esque! Ha ha. I
threw a bunch of songs onto her iTunes. Should be
cheerleading routine worthy.

Still. Paris Hilton.

When she, my brother and my SIL came inside to pick up
the goods, I gave her a look.

"I am deeply shamed."

"Why?"

"You had that stupid blonde...princess!"

And then of course my brother and SIL start
complaining about all the other music to begin with
(and yes, she does have some nasty bump n grind music
on there and she is BARELY 13, for chrissake).

My niece "oh...Paris Hilton song?"

Me: "YES. Anything but Paris Hilton for the love of
God!"